The Lion King taught us about the circle of life – what goes around, comes around and is made new. Well, I believe we have more than one circle in our lives which tie in our environment, health, attitudes, etc.
Twenty plus years ago I had a horrendous manic high which turned into a euphoric high with a new medication which was supposed to bring me down. I ended up yielding to voices that put me into horrible danger, ending in a tragedy that could have cost me my life and almost cost me the ability to walk. I came out with the start of my chronic pain and years of battling mania, depression and disabling physical conditions. Thus began the health circle.
Actually that’s not true. It began when I was young, teased and bullied. This led to depression (at 8). And the physical started young too with chronic bronchitis and allergies in my early years, followed closely by a knee injury and botched surgery at 15 that eventually meant total joint replacement before I was 50.
Throughout my life these events all kept circling each other, making life a series of challenges that did not seem to stop. The challenges are still happening to some degree; however, my circles of life are more lop-sided with the upturns much larger than the downturns most of the time.
At the moment I am going through some very large downturns in my circle of mental/physical health. A compromised immune system is keeping me in a constant state of cold/flu symptoms. This, as well as increased pain from my fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis and other factors, have been playing on my emotions. If I get stressed for any reason I tend to eat the wrong things, which also affect both physical and mental symptoms. And I tend to get harder on myself because I can’t function as I feel I should.
For example, I cried about five times yesterday over things that were either out of my control or too small to worry about. One thing was that no one was commenting on or liking my new blog. Something that I would normally be able to logically figure out, had me questioning my very being. Yes, a drama queen reaction, but that is exactly how I can get when my circles are not fully aligned.
What do my aligned circles look like?
- I have my chronic pain managed through medication, exercise and techniques I have learned over the years.
- I have my pill packs filled and take my medications on time. At the moment I am having to take them out of the bottles and don’t always do it on schedule or take all of them.
- My house is relatively clean and tidy so that my OCD doesn’t kick in regarding a lot of clutter. Also, when it is tidy it is easier for me to take care of when my pain does flare.
- I keep active, even if I am not well enough to go out anywhere.
- I limit stress as much as I can.
- I socialize, even if it is online or phone calls.
- I pray, do my devotions regularly and remember that God loves me just as I am. In fact He made me this way for His purposes
- I remember I have a husband and good friends who love me and are here for me.
So, today I have my beloved hubby home and we plan to do some work around the house and have some relaxation time. He didn’t always understand how my circles worked (and he has his own to manage); however, now he knows just what to do or say and I know that he believes in me when I can’t.