I don’t talk enough about my best friend. This person has stuck by me through really tough times, has stood up to me when others just walked away, has encouraged me just to be myself and has had faith enough for us both when mine was weak.
I am referring, of course, to my wonderful Hubby. We went through a rough time for the first two-thirds of our 15-year marriage. We were both looking for what WE needed from the other person instead of concentrating on what we could do for our partner. (I will not lie, we had to go to rock bottom where we both wanted out to see what we would be missing).
What held us together? It was the fact that we had been friends for a lot longer than we had been married. That bond is still very strong.
Now, we not only listen to each other, we use our energy and emotions to give our spouse everything they could need or want … so we get what we want without having to make demands or fight about it. It is amazing how well it works.
Now, this is not to say we don’t have arguments; however, they are never huge blow-ups anymore, and the two of us strive never to fight about the same thing twice.
The main change I see in my Hubby is he doesn’t get so frustrated with me anymore. He has such patience when I make a mistake by spending too much money, or forgetting to do laundry when he needs clothes for work. It makes me want to try harder because he accepts my mental and physical challenges and does his best to encourage me. In turn, I want to help him more with his health issues by cooking the right foods (instead of doubting he needs them), asking how he is doing when I know he is struggling at work, and just being a good wife.
Since we have come to be more attentive to each other, I feel that we are both so much more in tune with God and our faith. No, we don’t get to church often because of our separate fatigue issues; however, we pray more and strive to be the people God wants us to be.
When Hubby said he wanted to try for another position in his company, I was happy for him. In the past I would probably have been down on him, telling him he probably wouldn’t get it. This time, I encouraged him to try, and when he didn’t get it, I was there for him as well. But he was fine about it.
When I said I wanted to pursue my freelance writing again, Hubby was all for it. The funny part of this is that when I left the government to do freelance work, Hubby was one of my first clients. That was our second meeting, though we wouldn’t get together as a couple for another nine years.
We have several songs that describe our feelings for each other; however I think Queen said it quite well.
“You’re My Best Friend”
Ooh, you make me live
Whatever this world can give to me
It’s you, you’re all I see
Ooh, you make me live now honey
Ooh, you make me liveYou’re the best friend
That I ever had
I’ve been with you such a long time
You’re my sunshine
And I want you to know
That my feelings are true
I really love you
You’re my best friend…
You’re the first one
When things turn out bad
You know I’ll never be lonely
You’re my only one
And I love the things
I really love the things that you do
You’re my best friend