When you are dealing with any sort of chronic illness, whether it be physical, mental, or a combination, it is very easy to get immersed in your own little world.
This can happen for a variety of reasons, the main one being that you feel (and usually are) isolated from what used to be a full life. Instead of working or going to school and nights on the town you are faced with appointments, medications, and insomnia.
In the half full/half empty glass analogy, yours would be empty (at least in your mind).
I am the type of person who puts my whole being into whatever I take on. This could be a job, a hobby, a relationship. And, as happens so often, after going all-in for awhile I eventually burn out. It is no different with my health.
For so long I was drowning in what was wrong with me. I don’t mean that I obsessed with being sick. It was more that I pushed people and things away because of being too tired, too sick or too afraid to “try”.
In the last couple of years, I have been able to start turning that around. I have been able to concentrate on what I CAN do and what is important in relation to the health aspects of my life.
One of those things is this very blog. It has become my lifeline in many ways. I can convey what is going on to people in my life who choose to read it and I have made a whole lot of quality friendships just by writing and reading!
Nothing has really changed – I don’t get to many social events or if I do I don’t tend to stay long. I don’t work or get out shopping a lot, but I do not feel as isolated or alone. That is really big considering I deal with things that only people in the same circumstances can relate to.
I have been told by people who do know me that they can understand my situation better by reading my posts. I guess that’s because writing it down is more a process of opening up than explaining things face to face. Whatever it is, I’ll take it.
Anyway, the point of this was just to say that we all have a choice – immerse ourselves in the woes of the world or bathe in the rays of positivity!