Happy New Year, everyone!
If you have been following me for some time, you may remember that my Life Coach encouraged me to come up with a word to take into the new year. In 2016 it was “Vibrant” and in 2017 “Limitless”. So, how does a word like “Accountability” fit in with the positivity of the other two?
Quite simple, really.
Accountability can be a negative term. For example, when you are being held accountable in a court of law, or a teen accountable for their actions by being grounded by their parents.
I plan to hold myself accountable so I can continue to evolve into the vibrant woman I was meant to be with limitless possibilities open to me. I have mentioned previously some of the ways I need to be accountable but there are certainly more.
- I have mentioned that I am not very good with money. This can be a trait of bipolar disorder. If I have a credit card, I use it, even when I know that I shouldn’t. I don’t carry cash for the same reason. I am responsible for the grocery and pet budgets plus get a small amount of personal money. I seem to be very good with these amounts and spend them wisely. However, beyond that, I have finally admitted I am not good with credit. I made a deal with my Hubby that if he paid off my card I would take it off of every auto pay subscription and my PayPal account, would rip up the piece of paper with the number on (Hubby has the card) and allow it and any other credit I have to be closed. This means that other than the small amount of money I get for personal use (and the household money I am good with), I cannot spend anything without going through my Hubby.
Isn’t this a little negative? No, not at all. In fact, I find it very freeing because I have no temptation because I simply can’t spend anything I don’t have. We decided I could attach my personal chequing account to PayPal as I need something there.
- The other addiction I have is to food. Again, I have mentioned this and my bingeing disorder before. How am I going to be accountable for this one? We got an Instant Pot before Christmas and I have made so many very healthy meals in it in a fraction of the normal time. I love the food I make with the pressure cooker and being able to eat good food is a big step. I am also keeping healthy snacks that I will eat like cauliflower and dip. The dip isn’t that healthy but it isn’t bad either. It is a matter of finding the right balance. We had a few indulgences over the holidays like ice cream, chocolates, cookies, etc.; however, I either buried them in the freezer or let Hubby be in charge of them and only give me one once in a while. Again, I feel free and it gives me the opportunity to cook well whether I have the energy or not.
- I also need to be accountable for my self (not myself even though that is a given for everyone). I need to be more focused on losing the weight I need to for my chronic health and to get as fit physically and mentally as possible. I am continuing on with a service I will be reviewing very soon called “Zero to Hero” and art Journalling with “Determined to Shine”. Making sure I make time for both of these already helps me with me.
- I need to be more accountable to you, my faithful readers. Now before you say no, please hear me out. For the past 6 months or so I have slacked off from writing. I have over 200 draft posts that I have given up on. I used to faithfully read your blogs on a regular basis; however, I haven’t had the energy. At least that is what I have been telling myself. The statement I gave my husband is “Get writing more or decide to give up all or parts of my internet life”.Now, if that sounds harsh, it was meant to be – for me to wake up and decide what is important to me. And the answer to that is my writing and my connection to the blogosphere. I need to put on hold thoughts of freelancing and writing a book until I can manage what I have started first. Being Lydia is very important to me as is each one of you. Again, I feel freedom in accountability.
There is more, but I think that is good for now!
I have a crazy idea that I was hoping to start today, but it looks like it will be tomorrow and then every Tuesday after that. Once a week I want to do a short video spot and put it on Being Lydia. My Hubby is going to help me set this up. If I can break through the walls of hating myself in pictures or video, I will make great strides. Also, it will be a way for you, my readers/viewers, to see any changes (weight, confidence, etc.)
Thank you for reading and I look forward to whatever 2018 brings!